Respect is earned, not given. This statement is the mantra, explicit or implied, of every athletic team and military academy around the world. On occasion it appears in the academic world, and even Average Joe has probably heard it at least once in his lifetime. Many people would agree with the statement that respect must be earned, and some would point to Scotty Small’s miraculous outfield catch that finally won him the respect of his teammates in The Sandlot as proof. Thus, the idea that respect must be earned is not a foreign one, and most people understand that earning respect from peers is in and of itself an elementary accomplishment. What people often fail to grasp is the important concept that earning the respect of those who are themselves respected is a vital, yet formidable task which can only be accomplished in certain ways.
Looming on every college student’s horizon is the “real world”; that almost mythical place of bills, paychecks, 8-hour work-days, and of course, careers. There is also a myriad of people who determine how smoothly life goes for a recent college graduate. These include, graduate school officials, employers, co-workers, and someday subordinates. Each of these people occupies a respected position in the social structure, and earning and retaining their respect is vital to success. There are three simple avenues to earning people’s respect and perhaps even making friends along the way.
First, one should always be humble, but confident. There is no one alive who likes an arrogant wise guy who refuses to see any other way than his own. At the same time, intelligent people expect other intelligent people to have ideas and opinions of their own and to be bold in defending those positions. Also, it is important to assess with modesty whether one’s abilities line up with the requirements and responsibilities of a job or task, but be confident in assuming that role, even if it requires taking a risk. However, one should make sure that risk is not too much to handle, for people have no respect for someone who fails to fulfill his commitments. A person’s word is a powerful tool if there is weight behind it, and making good on promises is the only way to build the trust necessary for one’s word to be respected. Finally, one must treat others with the dignity they deserve. All humanity was created by God for his glory, thus every human has a worth which no one may deny them. Acknowledging and protecting the rights of others will earn one the same kind of respect from people across the social spectrum.
Earning the respect of respected individuals is not always an easy task. It takes the proper balance of humility and confidence, a determination to keep one’s word, and a resolve to treat everyone with the dignity their humanity deserves. Respect is a precious commodity, and can be easily lost, but if protected it is the foundation for healthy relationships and lifelong success.
